I am the first to admit that I have a serious issue with patience. I either have too little or too much, and it is rare that I choose the right amount of patience for the situations I find myself in. I know I'm not alone in this situation, especially when it comes to romantic relationships.
After a certain age there is this incredible pressure to be romantically attached. It's almost like we're meant to feel "less than" because we aren't married or in some sort of long-term, committed relationship. We're the third wheel, the fifth wheel, the person who has to ride alone at Disneyland. Sometimes we're left out of plans, because it's a "couple thing." We sit through sermon after sermon about marriage and family life. We're told, "You don't get it," because we're not attached.
Those things start to play on us, and so we begin to think we're too picky (we're told that over and over, after all). We start thinking we should just settle for that guy who is kind of okay. We allow men to take us for granted. We listen to words instead of paying attention to their actions. We find ourselves giving so much patience to those that don't deserve it.
And then, after so many times of being burned, we finally give up. We lose that patience. We stop giving the good guys a chance, because we no longer trust them. Everything they do is viewed under a lens of suspicion, and eventually we walk away.
So what's the fine line here? The fine line is God's voice. It's the Holy Spirit. It's trusting the gut God gave us and learning to lose our patience for the pressure to be attached and grow some patience for allowing God to bring the right person into our lives.
I wish I could say that I've mastered patience. I've found myself failing more times that I can count, but I insist I'm going to keep trying to get it right. One day I'm going to give the right man the patience he deserves, and I'm going to stop giving the men that God hasn't chosen for me chance after chance to keep breaking my heart.
Every day I get better, and I trust God more. Join me on this journey to learn patience. Let's spend this week in prayer for discerning patience. Ask God to tell us when it's time to get out of a situation, to cut ties and give no more chances. Ask Him to let the constant digs about being single run off of your back. Ask Him to help us let go of all the bitterness and hurt so that we open our hearts and give patience to the right partners.
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